This weeks’s theme tune - In a slight deriative tune from Mighty Mouse
Here they come to save the day
Only a chicken nugget,
can save the summit
and keep that pesky meteor at bay
They fly in the Normandy Mk 1
Our heroes need to get this done
The 4 of them make up the crew
knowing that the need of the many outweigh the few
Our intrepid heroes are situated on the Normandy when they are interrupted by a high priority message coming over the message terminal. They all make their way to the communication room where Forge switches on the holographic comm system.
A reverend like figure is shown on the screen; his hair is long and the arms of his holy tunic is ripped to show the off his guns. He’s also wearing a badge that says “APAAS Award Winner”.
*In a gospel like manner, complete with choir behind him, he outlines the mission. He ends the speech by saying God Speed, the fate of the Mcnuggets lay in your hands.
After the briefing, they come up with a plan,
Reed: Ok, I’ve got experience with space based objects and disasters, I might even have a good idea on how to get rid of it, I might have to call in a big favour. A really BIG purple favour.
Forge: Ok, so what about the saviour of all things greasy, how are we going to save the ambassador of the happy meal?
Xander: Well me and Mr Happy over there can land on Eden Prime and sneak into the compound.
Riddick: Just get me in there, I’ll sort out the rest, you’ll just have to keep up. The meal isn’t the only thing that’s going to be large, the body count is.
Xander: Ok, well I have experience of getting into compounds like this. What we’ll do is get Forge to design us a holographic disguise where we will sneak into the compound as temporary workers. We’ll shut down the lights so that Riddick can do his magic while I go and locate the target.
Reed: He puts down the phone after calling in a favour from Norin Rad, "Ok, we’re going to have help in about 2 hours*.
So they make their way to Eden Prime. They land in the Mako and travel over mountains, flip over a couple of times and salvage some parts. Forge uses his shaman powers (I am far from the bones of my people…) to feel for the life force of R.McDonald and his captors.
After being kitted out with the holographic devices the Forge designed, Xander and Riddick infiltrate the base posing as temporary workers.
Xander goes to look for R.McDonald and during his travels; he finds out that the reason for the coup is that the last time,
R.McDonald was on their planet, their nuggets took longer than 5 minutes and were cold, so they wanted revenge, that and one of them scolded themselves on a hot apple pie.
From the Mako, Reed Richards patches into the complex and shuts down the lights causing everything to go dark.
Riddick: Let’s get this party started; I’m an animal when I’m hungry
Mayhem starts - through the burst of gunfire, you can see Riddick slicing down the captors with ease, as his eyeshine locates them with relative simplicity - He finds himself in a room with the Fast food overloads (Burger King, The Colonel, Wendy, Wimpy and the Nando’s chicken). Surrounding them are tons of their minions). After a 10 minute explanation of their plans, they sic hundreds of trained fighters to attack Riddick. It’s quite similar to the Neo vs Smith battle in the Matrix 2).
Xander in the meantime, has located R.McDonald, although he did punch him in the face by accident after rounding a corner and getting scared by the clown. After apologising, they make their way to the central chamber where Riddick is covered in blood (or is it ketchup) eating a cheeseburger.
Riddick: Took your sweet time, looks like we’re done here. Stay a while, the McFlurry is delicious
Meanwhile back on the Normandy, Forge and Richards have made their way back to the comet
Norin Rad: “I’m here as you asked, what task requires my cosmic help”
Forge: There’s a giant meteor heading towards Eden Prime, we need to get rid of it and figure out where it came from.
Richards: Well, I did have an idea of shooting a giant ball mixture of hamburger meat and nuggets to alter the course of the meteor, but I decided to call you instead.
Norin Rad listens intently, and after listening to the details, summons his boss to eat the meteor.
After a near choking incident, they gather back together to discuss the deed.
Norin: The deed is done, although I have to inform you that my boss has commented that it had a weird aftertaste, almost like it was strained through a beetle’s colon.
Reed and Forge look at each other before nodding as they come to the same conclusion.
Forge: This must be the meteor gun that our commander was talking about, I’ve heard of an initiative called Project Aerial Surgical Strike - Cleansing And Nuking Nationals Or Natives"
Richard: We can track the meteor course by using complex maths, we can trace the course of the meteor from the destination point of Eden Prime, draw a straight line and the first planet we reach must be the source of the launch site.
After picking up the others, cleaning the complex on Eden Prime and ensuring that the nuggets are piping hot, our heroes make their way back to the source of the gun.
They discuss on how to get rid of the gun, after heated discussions, some crying and some pouting, Riddick convinces the rest of the group by saying “Nuke them from orbit; it’s the only way to be sure.
So using the immense weaponry aboard the Normandy, they begin to bombard the planet thus eliminating the threat and saving the galaxy once more.
A querky ship with a new rebuild…things added to the design… you know… just saying.
