Shat Kirk vs Pine Kirk

[TPO]

Surprised this one hasn’t been done since the new movie came out. Now it’s through to DVD (which I presume we’ve all bought and watched to death), I think we can give due consideration to the weightiest question of our age.

Who would win if classic Shatner Kirk from the original timeline was zapped through a transporter malfunction and found himself in the new alternate timeline and had to slug it out with his Chris Pine alter-ego (black eyeliner optional).

To make it a fair fight, lets assume we’re talking TOS Shat, not the ever expanding Shat from the movies.

Let battle commence! This is a fight to the artfully placed tear in your shirt!

[demolitionplayer57]

right now i’m watching it and i have to say the pine wins

[ThotFullGuy]

Oh please, there’s no contest here.

Mr. Abrams you made a great movie. Chris you dd a fine Kirk, kiddo.

But the Shat is the Shat and is Forever Kirk. Chris Pine, one movie does not a Kirk make.

[Thunderscreech]

Gotta go with Shatner Kirk. They both have the same natural ability, but Shatner Kirk had more experience by the equivalent time because of his traveling around as a kid, starting Starfleet Academy earlier, etc.

When ability is equal, experience gives the winning edge.

[Solai]

You cannot compare Shat to the Pine. They are both temporary custodians of the Kirk. My ally is the Kirk, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Kirk’s energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we…not this crude matter. You must feel the Kirk around you. Here, between you…me…the tree…the rock…everywhere! Yes, even between this post and that survey!

[TPO]

You cannot compare Shat to the Pine. They are both temporary custodians of the Kirk. My ally is the Kirk, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Kirk’s energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we…not this crude matter. You must feel the Kirk around you. Here, between you…me…the tree…the rock…everywhere! Yes, even between this post and that survey!

I…I don’t beleive it…

[ThotFullGuy]

I…I don’t beleive it…

“That is way you fail.”

I want frakkintalos to vote for Pine in this poll cuz I’ve always wanted to know what it’s like to feel my head explode.

[Solai]

I want frakkintalos to vote for Pine in this poll cuz I’ve always wanted to know what it’s like to feel my head explode.

Did you just use ‘poll’ and ‘head explode’ in the same sentence? Be careful with that undetonated innuendo, it could blow at any minute!

…uh oh. Now do you see what you made me do?

I did it again! Crap! There is another one! Aieeeeeeeeeee!

[ThotFullGuy]

Did you just use ‘poll’ and ‘head explode’ in the same sentence? Be careful with that undetonated innuendo, it could blow at any minute!

…uh oh. Now do you see what you made me do?

I did it again! Crap! There is another one! Aieeeeeeeeeee!

What? Wa…what are you talking about? Innuendo and double meanings on the GWC forum. That’s a weird idea. It would blow away all decorum and civility, leaving a sticky wet residue of snark. What a weirdo you are

[missmuffet]

I like The Pine better than The Shat. Mostly I think because The Pine is dreamy.

[Solai]

What? Wa…what are you talking about? Innuendo and double meanings on the GWC forum. That’s a weird idea. It would blow away all decorum and civility, leaving a sticky wet residue of snark. What a weirdo you are

[ThotFullGuy]

I think two very strange and unprecedented things may be happening right before our eyes.
1). The topic is drifting.
2). It’s drifting toward the gutter.
OMGs! What do we do?!! Should we panic!!!

(PS. The Shat rules)

[Solai]

I think two very strange and unprecedented things may be happening right before our eyes.
1). The topic is drifting.
2). It’s drifting toward the gutter.
OMGs! What do we do?!! Should we panic!!!

(PS. The Shat rules)

Ok, back on topic: Vote for Pine! Let’s drive 'talos crazy! Pine is empirically better.

Doesn’t wear a rug on his head: Pine
Doesn’t make out with Gorn: Pine
Can exhale without his stomach knocking over a toddler: Pine
Punched Spock: Pine
Actually had blood on his face after taking a punch: Pine

The list goes on!

[ThotFullGuy]

Ok, back on topic: Vote for Pine! Let’s drive 'talos crazy! Pine is empirically better.

Doesn’t wear a rug on his head: Pine
Doesn’t make out with Gorn: Pine
Can exhale without his stomach knocking over a toddler: Pine
Punched Spock: Pine
Actually had blood on his face after taking a punch: Pine

The list goes on!

Chris Pine is awesome! I love Chris Pine! He’s got waaay way waaaay stronger fingers for hanging off cliffs and stuff.
Who kissed Uhura? Pine did (oh wait…no that was Shat)
Oh, and who’s got the cool bar pick up lines. That’s right. Pine does.

(tho I can’t help myself— Shat Kirk punched Spock a time or two too.)

[frakkintalos]

You cannot compare Shat to the Pine. They are both temporary custodians of the Kirk. My ally is the Kirk, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Kirk’s energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we…not this crude matter. You must feel the Kirk around you. Here, between you…me…the tree…the rock…everywhere! Yes, even between this post and that survey!

I have a new mantra.

I want frakkintalos to vote for Pine in this poll cuz I’ve always wanted to know what it’s like to feel my head explode.

Yeah. The universe would implode. Can’t do that.

I guess it’s kinda obvious what my vote is.

I’d just like to say that 79 year old “expanding” Shatner would wipe the mat with that young whipper snapper. It’s like fighting your dad. You could be the greatest fighter in the world but your dad can still Kirk your arse.

Shat Kirk would walk on the bridge and say to Pine Kirk, “Get out of the chair.” Pine Kirk would say, “Yes, Mr. Shatner.” and probably wet himself.

That’s all I’ve got to say about that.

[ThotFullGuy]

Shat Kirk would walk on the bridge and say to Pine Kirk, “Get out of the chair.” Pine Kirk would say, “Yes, Mr. Shatner.” and probably wet himself.

That’s all I’ve got to say about that.

… and now I’ve just wet myself.

[Solai]

Shat Kirk would walk on the bridge and say to Pine Kirk, “Get out of the chair.” Pine Kirk would say, “Yes, Mr. Shatner.” and probably wet himself.

You would too. I mean, if Pine didn’t move and Shat sat down on top of Pine it would probably kill him.

[frakkintalos]

Ok, back on topic: Vote for Pine! Let’s drive 'talos crazy! Pine is empirically better.

Crazy?!? I’m way past that.

Doesn’t wear a rug on his head: Pine

Yeah? How do you know?

Doesn’t make out with Gorn: Pine

Yet. Yet.

Can exhale without his stomach knocking over a toddler: Pine

Give it time. Give it time. We all get there, eventually.

Punched Spock: Pine

Shat: Been there, done that.

Actually had blood on his face after taking a punch: Pine

Shatner’s blood is precious. It cures Chuck Norris.

You would too. I mean, if Pine didn’t move and Shat sat down on top of Pine it would probably kill him.

Aye! You’re trying to get me Irish up? And this on St. Paddy’s Day.

[Solai]

Aye! You’re trying to get me Irish up? And this on St. Paddy’s Day.

Just having fun inciting holy war. It’s what I do.

[ThotFullGuy]

Aye! You’re trying to get me Irish up? And this on St. Paddy’s Day.

What’s that ya say laddie?