Life is teh suck today because (a.ka. the official B_tch & Moan thread)

[Keara]

Life is teh sweet.

Amen.

You know, when I started this thread, it was because I had something unpleasant to unload that particular day. Just a way to vent, you know. But somehow, and I’m so glad of this, as we rant and cry here, support is offered and all the rants and sadness become transformed into something positive through that support.

[BadgerSpoon]

The worst part is that it wasn’t black and white…I had to decide when she had declined “enough” and I still wasn’t 100% sure even though most everyone around me supported the decision. I feel like a murderer.

Don’t. It was definitely time. She was mostly blind and deaf, painfully arthritic, riddled with skin infections, and almost always confused and afraid. She was suffering and had been for some time. This was the right thing to do. Really.

It is far from apples and oranges to compare dogs and hamsters. If it’s a family pet and you love it, then it’s the same thing. You take responsibility for their care and their lives and without being able to talk to them, you have to get inside their heads and try to determine if they are suffering “enough” to make the decision for them. So, don’t diminish what you went through with your hamster. As far as I’m concerned, it’s the same. (Heck, we lost a hermit crab a few weeks ago and I got choked-up.)

Thank you for your kind words. It’s a bit better today. The worst part is not only processing my own grief but dealing with that of my 8 yr old son, who is angry with me, as I told RMHPH, for not giving him the chance to say goodbye, “for killing her when she wanted to live,” and for not allowing him to come along when I did it. He’s mixed-up emotionally and it is extra-painful for me to watch him go through this.

I’m glad I was with her at the end, but at the same time, it was the hardest thing I have ever had to witness. I had her in my arms and the sudden change when she went limp was shocking and painful to me. That will stick with me for a long, long time. On the other hand, my best friend, who is a vet tech, went with me and after I was done holding her and saying goodbye, the vet had a table with a quilt for me to put her on. We put her there and I arranged her like she was sleeping on her dog bed and my best friend pulled the quilt over her like a blanket. It was a small gesture, but it’s one that means so much to me now that I really think about it. It was caring and I’m glad it’s one of the last things I’ll remember about Emma–her laying there with that quilt wrapped around her, looking like she was just peacefully sleeping.

Thanks for letting me get this out here, guys. It is so hard, all these emotions that I’m feeling and I haven’t felt grief like this for a long time.

It would be worse not to feel bad about it, like your neighbor, who’s hoping a car will hit her dog and save her the trouble. At least you and your family actually cared enough about Emma not to continue letting her waste away, not to mention that you actually care that she’s gone. That’s a good thing, in my book. Your son will come around; it’s just a lot to process right now.

[BadgerSpoon]

Work has taken me to downtown area today, and I’m driving from one frustrating errand to another, feeling worse about myself at every stop. Finally, at a traffic stop, I’ve cut off by this woman who glared at me and flipped me off before proceeding, leaving me stuck behind a double parked truck until every last one of the fifty million cars in the other lane has passed.

Worse yet, I saw the same woman a few blocks down the road, and I had a chance to pull up next to her bitch her out, but I didn’t do it. I know I did the right thing letting it go, but I don’t feel good about myself. In fact, I feel emasculated for not berating this person out until she felt so small about herself that she drove immediately home and shot herself.

I know life has far worse problems than who cut off whom at the stop light. I know that no one would think of me as more of a “man”, had I gotten of out the car and went up to yell at this person, even if I somehow “won” the argument.

But I cannot help feel small, angry, and frustrated. I feel like a small man for imagining walking up to her car with a tire iron and committing unthinkable violence at the next stop light. I feel angry that with all that is going wrong with the world, something as frivolous as being cut off in traffic will shake me so much. Mostly, I feel frustrated and sorry that I have to bring this up in this thread, because everyone else is discussing death of loved ones and other serious issues.

Beautiful summer is over here in Pacific Northwest, and 6 months of non-stop light drizzle has begun in earnest. Just wet enough to make everything sticky and piss me off right now, but not a downpour that could cool me down and wash away this day that I’d sooner forget. I cannot complain that “Life is teh suck” because I have it pretty good in every aspect, and I know a lot of other people have real life problems they are dealing with that are much more serious. But I feel shitty about myself today.

Note to self: Never anger DBT. Ever.

[BadgerSpoon]

My brother is still in the hospital. Hasn’t seen the doctor all day so he probably won’t be coming home tonight.

Why’s he in the hospital, if you mind my asking? Nothing serious, I hope?

[Keara]

Don’t. It was definitely time. She was mostly blind and deaf, painfully arthritic, riddled with skin infections, and almost always confused and afraid. She was suffering and had been for some time. This was the right thing to do. Really.

It would be worse not to feel bad about it, like your neighbor, who’s hoping a car will hit her dog and save her the trouble. At least you and your family actually cared enough about Emma not to continue letting her waste away, not to mention that you actually care that she’s gone. That’s a good thing, in my book. Your son will come around; it’s just a lot to process right now.

Thank you.

[Armando]

Half the time, he makes me want to get married, start a family, and have my own little dude who has that smile to melt anyone’s heart. The other half the time, I dread having to trade in all of my free time, interests, friends, social life and everything else to stand guard around the clock over the little poop machine.

You know what, though, in the middle of the night it sucks, but then, during the day, when she smiles, or better, when she cruises or scoots (she can crawl, she’s just too lazy to do it!) on her butt to come see you and THEN give you a big smile, it’s all worth it.

Her sister is 6. She started the first grade this year and is reading above grade level and doing a lot of writing. When I read her little stories or see her books lying around the house, when just a year ago she could just make out a few words here and there, I get all verklempt and wonder where the time is going. Before long she’ll be a teenager, then off to college (somehow. Cause at this rate I won’t be able to pay for it. UGH!). Elena will be following in those footsteps before long (she turns one on Monday. It seems like only yesterday I was writing about her ordeal in the hospital when she was born). I kind of want her to take her time, even if it means losing sleep.

[Pike]

Elena will be following in those footsteps before long (she turns one on Monday. It seems like only yesterday I was writing about her ordeal in the hospital when she was born).

Holy crap!

Man. Time does fly when you get older.

Tell her to stay off my lawn.

[Splatterson]

Elena will be following in those footsteps before long (she turns one on Monday. It seems like only yesterday I was writing about her ordeal in the hospital when she was born). I kind of want her to take her time, even if it means losing sleep.

Hey - Elena and I share a birthday. September 29th - a very good day! Give her an extra hug for me!!!

[Mr_Lister_Sir]

Amen.

You know, when I started this thread, it was because I had something unpleasant to unload that particular day. Just a way to vent, you know. But somehow, and I’m so glad of this, as we rant and cry here, support is offered and all the rants and sadness become transformed into something positive through that support.

A great SF series is the Callahan Cronicles by Spider Robinson. It takes place in a bar where everyone helps each other. This thread reminds my much of that book/bar. They have a theory that goes like this.

Callahan’s Law (also known as the Law of Conservation of Pain and Joy): “Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased—thus do we refute entropy.” Stated another way: “Just as there are Laws of Conservation of Matter and Energy, so there are in fact Laws of Conservation of Pain and Joy. Neither can ever be created or destroyed. But one can be converted into the other.”

[Steve]

Why’s he in the hospital, if you mind my asking? Nothing serious, I hope?

Fortunately it turned out to be nothing serious. Just needs to take antibiotics.

Problem is, he hasn’t seen the other doctor that needs to come by before he can leave today. So, he MIGHT have to spend the whole weekend up there because the guy couldn’t drop by for 2 minutes to say hi.

I’m thinking about busting him out around 9:00. At least one of the nurses brought him a cheeseburger earlier.

ETA: Update! He is actually getting to come home now! Woot! Also, he’s well enough to drive so I don’t even have to go back and get him

[BadgerSpoon]

Fortunately it turned out to be nothing serious. Just needs to take antibiotics.

Problem is, he hasn’t seen the other doctor that needs to come by before he can leave today. So, he MIGHT have to spend the whole weekend up there because the guy couldn’t drop by for 2 minutes to say hi.

I’m thinking about busting him out around 9:00. At least one of the nurses brought him a cheeseburger earlier.

ETA: Update! He is actually getting to come home now! Woot! Also, he’s well enough to drive so I don’t even have to go back and get him

Hooray!

[Casilda]

Steve, it’s great to hear your brother gets to come home

My complaint? My home internet has been out since last night, and they can’t get someone out until tomorrow afternoon… and even then, depending on what the problem is, they might not be able to fix it until mid next week.

So if you don’t see me around as much… that would be why. And I have to miss the Life of Brian frak party

[Steve]

Steve, it’s great to hear your brother gets to come home

My complaint? My home internet has been out since last night, and they can’t get someone out until tomorrow afternoon… and even then, depending on what the problem is, they might not be able to fix it until mid next week.

So if you don’t see me around as much… that would be why. And I have to miss the Life of Brian frak party

I hate when the internets stop working right as the weekend starts up

[deathbytray]

The Life of Brian, 10 PM tonight. “Romans Go Home!”

For reals? Is this really scheduled? Why didn’t I know about this? Craaaaaap, I must drive home at reckless speed and find that DVD!

(On second thought, I’ll drive home at a “reasonable” speed. I learned my lesson about road rage. For this week, at least. :o)

[Default_Prophet]

Fortunately it turned out to be nothing serious. Just needs to take antibiotics.

Problem is, he hasn’t seen the other doctor that needs to come by before he can leave today. So, he MIGHT have to spend the whole weekend up there because the guy couldn’t drop by for 2 minutes to say hi.

I’m thinking about busting him out around 9:00. At least one of the nurses brought him a cheeseburger earlier.

ETA: Update! He is actually getting to come home now! Woot! Also, he’s well enough to drive so I don’t even have to go back and get him

[BadgerSpoon]

For reals? Is this really scheduled? Why didn’t I know about this? Craaaaaap, I must drive home at reckless speed and find that DVD!

(On second thought, I’ll drive home at a “reasonable” speed. I learned my lesson about road rage. For this week, at least. :o)

What happened? We missed you.

[deathbytray]

What happened? We missed you.

Yeah, I know, dude. Looks like y’all had fun. I have been co-opted by the visiting parental units as the designated driver/tour-guide. This is the second Python frak party I’ve missed… very sad about that

I hope there’s gonna be a Meaning of Life frak party. I won’t miss that one, I swear! Every sperm is sacred~

[Casilda]

update on the internet:
they called this morning to say that they wouldn’t make it out here today… but when I got home around 5, the internet was working. it’s a miracle!

[Lady_D]

update on the internet:
they called this morning to say that they wouldn’t make it out here today…

wow! the internet called you?!?!?

sorry…pesky pronouns

glad to see you’re back

[Steve]

update on the internet:
they called this morning to say that they wouldn’t make it out here today… but when I got home around 5, the internet was working. it’s a miracle!

Woot!

ratlaB