AHHHH - my eyes! This thread is going to make me wash out my eyes with acid so all the scary images will go away!!!
The only thing I’m surprised about is that it took this long to get here.
Ya know, I’m wondering if Palpy accidently zapped himself by using force lightning while taking a whiz.
How did you get here without help from GR’s Gutter Services&Repairs?
Copied from the CAPTION This thead. Hey, don’t blame me. It was Sean (wasn’t it?) who came up with the toilet/elevator idea.
[COLOR=“Wheat”]Luke:[/COLOR] i[/i]. Do you smell something? What is that? It’s terrible!
Vader: Well, you see the Emperor uses this …um…what I mean is…Never mind. Trust me, you don’t want to know.
[COLOR=“Wheat”]Luke:[/COLOR] (whispering to Vader). Did I see a toilet paper dispenser in the elevator that we just walked out of? What’s going on here?
Vader:(whispers back) Shhhh! Keep, your voice down! The Emperor gets all weird when people talk about is toilet/elevator. DO NOT mention it when we get to the top of these stairs.
[COLOR=“Wheat”]Luke:[/COLOR] (whispering to Vader). Toilet/elevator? What a sicko. Remember that thing you said about you and me ruling the galaxy together as father and son? Well, if I did agree to that—not saying I will—I’m saying IF—well, that elevator crapper’s gotta go, Agreed?
Vader:(whispers back) Done deal…besides, you won’t need a bathroom anyway. I’ll get you a suit like mine. It’s …ah…self sufficient in the waste disposal dept, IYKWIM.
[COLOR=“Wheat”]Luke:[/COLOR] (says under his breath) All right, that’s the last straw! I am never joining the Dark Side.
I blame the Grevious/Gollum cat.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Dad?
Vader: Yes Luke?
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Are you grabbing my butt?
Vader: No, why?
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Something is grabbing my butt.
Vader: Oh. Uh-oh.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Uh-oh?
Vader: Yeah. About that. This is the Emperor’s elevator.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Yeah?
Vader: It has some special features.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Do I want to know?
Vader: It might be easier on you if you know.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Ok.
Vader: The elevator was designed to help you evacuate in your moment of triumph.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Come again?
Vader: No, it doesn’t do that.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Do what?
Vader: It, erm…will assist you heaving a Havana
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] What?
Vader: It will point you the way to Mrs. Murphy.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Huh?
Vader: Pinch a loaf.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Not following you.
Vader: This is an elevator and the little Jedi’s room.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Jedi’s room?
Vader: Did you not notice the lovely porcelain fixtures?
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] DAD! C’MON!
Vader: Good lord son. It is the crapper. The Emperor’s crapper.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] …and it is grabbing my butt, why?
Vader: The Emperor is an old man…sometimes he needs some help.
[COLOR=wheat]Luke:[/COLOR] Uh-oh.
GR, you have never repaired a gutter in your life! Misrepresentation of services! You are only able to service the gutter by filling it with things…
This litterally made me tear with laughter…my favorite lines quote above.
Vader: Just be glad you’re facing the door.
Almost reminds me of night at the roxbury. “did you touch my ass?”
personally, i feel like going to the bathroom is one of the few chances palpatine has to be on his own. where else can he plot galactic domination in solice??
I prefer to think that he does Sudoku…
yeah but his “Sudoku for Sith” book requires too much concentration. The force is strong with him, but he has other things to concentrate on…
such as bathroom activities
and galactic domination
But was the Count upset with the publisher for slaughtering his name on the cover?
Still, the Emperor going to the bathroom has to have a force matter involved. Considering how hideous he looked, perhaps the Dark Side warped his biochem enough to where there wasn’t much of anything under the robe at all. He would then be just The Cheat on stilts wearing a Halloween mask, no?
You’re right, I know you can end up pooping out a whole slew of evil and you can’t remain an evil overlord if you’re pooping out all your best homegrown material!
I love that my vote, at least temporarily , put Baltar over the edge.
I figure if such a book existed it was written by one of the Emperor’s prior apprentices… I guess that could make it “Dooku’s Sudoku for Sith”…
Palpatine has been holding it in all those years. That’s why he looked so terrible. That or he just peed on himself and anyone how laughed would “feel the power of the dark side”.
perhaps, and its designed for him to win likely… or maybe that’s the real reason dooku was axed?
another option nobody has considered, maybe when vader was getting hooked up with all those machines palpy (my new nickname for him), decided that “hey man, i’m trying to dominate a galaxy here, i’ve got better things to do than poo! hey doc, hook me up with one of those sweet machines!!!”