I can’t believe there isn’t a joke thread for Harry Potter in the forum!
How many wizards does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb. One to rotate the room.
How many Muggles does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One. It is the only thing they are good for.
A blind wizard walks into a pub. He says to the barkeep, “Want to hear a Hufflepuff joke?” The pub goes completely silent. The barkeep says, “Sir, I am a Hufflepuff. I’m used to handling a rough crowd alone. I have my wand drawn. The wizard to your left is an auror with his wand drawn. He too is a Hufflepuff. The witch on your right has her wand drawn. She is a dueling champion and also a Hufflepuff. Are you absolutely certain you want to tell that Hufflepuff joke?”
The blind wizard says, “Gods no! Not if I’m going to have to explain it three times!”
H.P. Pickup lines
I’ll slither in your gryffindor…
I’ll raven your claw so hard it will huffle your puff!!!
I’ll womp your willow
Stick your head in my sorting hat and I can tell you where you belong…
