Well, as many of you know, a morning on Twitter can often get silly very fast.
Somehow the topic of Voicemail messages and Lord of the Rings set matters off. Below is evidence of what can happen when we’ve got nothing better to do, and more to the point, what fun happens when we KNOW this is what we’d rather be doing 
janitorbob @ThotFullGWC I take over as boss on the 1st, so I have to cram all the training in between the holidays.
ThotFullGWC @janitorbob So what you’re saying is right now you feel a bit like Aragorn and you have anxiety about taking the Kingship of Gondor? Sorta?
janitorbob @ThotFullGWC More like Theoden with Grima Wormtongue whispering in my ear.
ThotFullGWC @janitorbob Got it. Well, look, if an undead ringwraith comes at you, don’t let him throw your horse on top of you and crush you. Safety tip
janitorbob @ThotFullGWC So, when Gondor calls let the answering machine get, right.
ThotFullGWC @janitorbob Yes. Of course. Do you need any help with the wording of the outgoing message?
janitorbob @ThotFullGWC This is the Rohirrim, were unable to take your call, but if you leave a message we’ll get back to you as soon as we can.
janitorbob @ThotFullGWC And who still uses fire to communicate? Come on even the Ents have cell phones, and you now how antiquated they are.
ThotFullGWC @janitorbob True. But have you ever seen an Ent’s cell phone bill? I mean, talk about going over their free minutes allocation. Sheesh.
ThotFullGWC @janitorbob Or maybe “You’ve reached the voicemail of King Theoden. Your call is important to us. Please leave a message at the horn-blow.”
janitorbob @ThotFullGWC You can go the smart ass method and say leave your message at the Hornburg.
ThotFullGWC @janitorbob Or you could try “Hello? What? …(static)…orry, I’m on my horse …(static)…iding thru a bad …(static) …coverage area.”
janitorbob @ThotFullGWC I know, “We can’t answer cause we’re riding to Gondors aid, just kidding, we’re all hiding out in Helms Deep.”
ThotFullGWC @janitorbob Middle Erf did have high-bandwidth voice/video networking (Palantirs) but the only subscribers were Saruman, Sauron and Denethor
ladydisdain @janitorbob you told the answering machine we’re out of town?!?! that’s like an engraved invitation to every orc in Middle Earth!!!
janitorbob @ladydisdain Oh craaap! I did didn’t I. Maybe I can rent a watch Balrog to keep an eye on the place.
TopgunGWC @ThotFullGWC Hello, this is Aragorn. Please leave a MSG at the beep, an I’ll get back to you. Maybe, in awhile. I can’t decide right now.
janitorbob @ThotFullGWC @TopgunGWC Ent answering machine. Hello…(deep inhalation)…(deep exhalation)…(BEEP)
ThotFullGWC @TopgunGWC Gandalf’s outgoing message.“Thanks for your call. I am currently dead right now.Please call back when I become Gandalf the White”
badgerspoon @janitorbob @ThotFullGWC @TopgunGWC Ent answering machines cut you off if your message is less than three days long.
TopgunGWC Hi this is Boromir. Please leave your message tied to a huge arrow and shoot it into my chest, and I’ll get back to you. Or, not.
janitorbob This machine is full. It was filled by the dead, and the dead don’t check it. This machine is full.
ThotFullGWC Hi this is Frodo,I will be on…“vacation”…for serveral weeks. Please leave a message and I’ll Ring you back.Oh! I meant"call" you back!
janitorbob This is (golem) (golem) Smeagol, leave a message and i’ll get back to you at my precious, I mean conveinence.
ThotFullGWC This is Pipin. If you need me, call me on my cell. I’m in f%#king Gondor.And Gondor doesn’t have any f%#king Hobbit sized phone booths.Dicks
janitorbob This is Elrond, Galadriel, Celebrimbor, Gandalf, Bilbo, and Frodo, We’re on a boat!
badgerspoon @ThotFullGWC Hi, this is Sauron. Leave a message, and I’ll give you a ring. Ha! Get it? Oh, and I see you!
ThotFullGWC @janitorbob snort good one. How’s this: “Hi this is Legolas. Leave a message. I’ll call you back when I have a bad hair/face day.Never!”
ThotFullGWC Hi, this is Faramir. Your call is important to me. Leave a message. Unless you’re my dad, in which case Go and F#%k Yourself, assh%le!!
janitorbob This is the Balrog of Morgoth, leave a message, please, I mean it please, no one calls, no one visits, please, i’m lonely.
ThotFullGWC Hi this is Eowyn. Please do not call. I’m trying to keep this line open in case I hear word that Aragorn and Arwen breakup.
janitorbob You have reached The Mines of Moria no one is available to answer the phone, …
ThotFullGWC You have reached Helm’s Deep. All our staff is “busy” right now. Please hold until until the morning of the 5th day…And look to the East.
janitorbob This is Bill the Pony, why has everyone forgotten about me!!!
ThotFullGWC Text message “Hey Pipin. It’s me, Merry. Guess what? I’m on horse and sitting on Eowyn’s lap. OMG, She is so smoking hot!!”
janitorbob Hi, you have reached “Grond” leave a message and i’ll come by and “knock” on your door.
rachel1975 ~This is Tom Bombadillo, with blue coat and boots of yellow. Leave a message if you dare to, and I’ll call you back if I care to!~
ThotFullGWC Hi this is Deagol. On vacation all week fishing w/ my friend Smeagol. It’s his birthday. Leave a message and I’ll call you when I return.Thx
dxferris “This is Treebeard the Ent. You have two minutes to leave a message. But if you can say it in two minutes, we’ll know it’s not important.”
ThotFullGWC You’ve reached the voicemail of Gwaihir and The Eagles. Please leave a message but only if it’s REALLY REALLY important.
TopgunGWC Hello. This is the Lurker in the Water. Please leave a message while I regenerate most of my limbs. Thanks.
TopgunGWC You’ve reached Elven Sword Repair. All our craftsman are busy on a rush job. Please leave a message and we’ll get back to you.
NCTibby Greetings, all hail the beautiful and terrible Queen Galadriel. Look upon me and despair as you leave your message after the tone.
NCTibby You’ve reached Minas Morgul; your soul is important to us. All Nazgul are currently out of the office. Leave a message after the SKREEE!!!
TopgunGWC You’ve reached the lair of Shelob the Great. We’re all tied up at the moment. Please call back after dinnertime.
TopgunGWC This is the House if Elrond. Please leave a message, which will be listened to with utter disdain and then deleted.
ladydisdain You have reached Arwen Evenstar. Please leave a message after the—DAD! I can TOO receive messages! Stop telling me what to----
ThotFullGWC Hi. You’ve reached the voicemail of the Trolls. Please call back during nighttime hours, otherwise we’ll turn to stone.
ThotFullGWC You’ve reached the voicemail of Rosie Gamgee (formerly R. Cotton.) This number has been disconnected. Married now and liiving at Bag End.
bkittysd You’ve reached the inbox of Eomer McCoy- I was galloping down a hillside when my molecules got scrambled! Dammit, Jim!!
TopgunGWC You’ve reached Grey Havens Travel. Daily cruises to the West at reasonable rates. Touch 1 for Elven. Touch 2 for Hobbit-speak.
ThotFullGWC Hi this is Smeagol.Today’s my birthday so I am away on a fishing trip with my friend Deagol.Leave a message, and I’ll give you a Ring back;)
ThotFullGWC McCoy/Eomer to Enterprise. Come in Enterprise. Enterprise, I want ship’s phasers on stun in a 100 m diameter in front of Helm’s Deep. Fire!!
bkittysd @ThotFullGWC LOL! Photon Torpedoes to Isingard!
rachel1975 Hi, this is Eowyn. Leave a message & I’ll call you when I get back from showing the boys how to kick some Modorian ass!
ThotFullGWC Hi you’ve reach the voicemal for Merry & Pippin’s place. We’ve been smokin’ Pipeweed all fraking day bro, so we can’t come to the phone now.
TopgunGWC You’ve reached Shadowfax, King of the Horses. Leave an elaborate and piercing whistle at the beep and I’ll return your call lickety-split.
badgerspoon You have reached the Witch King. After the beep, no man may leave a message!
NCTibby You’ve reached the voicemail of Arwen Evenstar. If you’re calling from the Elven student loan office about payments, come and claim them!
ThotFullGWC You’ve reached the voicemail of Celeborn of Lothlorien. If you’re looking for my wife Galadriel she’s left on a cruise (the bitch).
ThotFullGWC Hi this is Frodo-After-Mt-Doom. Leave a message but I can’t dial you back cuz Gollum bit off my f#%king finger and I can’t dial the phone!!
TopgunGWC Welcome to The Prancing Pony.We will be closed for renovations until Feb 2010. Come back soon !
