Aquaman/Superman vs. the Gulf Oil Leak

GWC Community Geek Deathmatch
#1

I was originally going to make this Iron Man/Superman vs. the Gulf Oil Leak but it seems to be Aquaman’s area of expertise.

Here they be, goals of three:

Goal the First: Stop the leak!
Goal the Second: Clean up the oil. This includes the coastline and my furry and feathered little friends.
Goal the Fifth: (Third sir!) Right, Goal the Third: There is no third goal. One of our weapons is confusion!

If someone at BP ends up in the phantom zone or our heroes find a sustainable alternative to fossil fuels bonus points should considered.

Superman can do anything, and I’m pretty sure aquaman can make this happen. Aquaman is one of the lesser-sung heroes of DC but if I remember correctly in addition to being able to breathe under water he’s very strong and can communicate with all marine life.

This might make a good Fantasy Sci Fi mission.

#2

Aww, come on.
Let’s give this one to Aquaman. The poor guy never has anything to do when the rest of the Justice League is doin’ all their land-based crimefightin’

#3

What no option for the Oil spill? Not that I would cheer for something as devastating as that, but after Darkest night Aquaman can only call upon undead sea creatures and can’t really control them. He also kills all the sea life where ever he swims. As for Supes, the oil spill is his only weakness, a plot device. Maybe the writers could use some sentient alien bacteria that cause the rig to explode and is living in the escaping oil that causes Supes a bad skin rash.

#4

Superman could drop a mountain on it.

#5

I give that one to Superman because, let’s face it, except for tea-time with the fishies he can do anything Aquaman can, but not vice-versa.

And if all else fails he can always just fly around the Earth real fast and reverse time no?

#6

I just like to see Superman sponges off Aquaman.

#7

I’m too sad and pessimistic about the whole spill to let the creative side of me imagine superhero responses… so Baltar. Because he’s Baltar, so he probably gave the Cylons the designs for BP’s offshore facility, and feels terribly guilty about the whole thing, until he convinces himself that his OneTrueGod loves him anyways.

#8

I was wondering that myself.

But, I’ll go Superman for lack of an Oil spill option. Plugging and cleaning the beaches should be “easy” for him. Dunno how he’d do get the oil out of the ocean though which is why I’d vote for the spill.

#9

Tasha Yar!!!

#10

Do penguins qualify as aquatic creatures while they are swimming underwater, and might Aquaman control them at that point? If so, I’ll give Aquaman the vote based on an idea I heard Colbert mention on his show: “Stuff the hole with oily penguins.”

I agree with Thot. Let’s give this one to the Man of Scales. Superman could solve this one in a dozen simple (to him) ways, up to and including time travel. A’s remedy is sure to involve lots of sonar bursts and seahorse-riding.

And maybe penguins.

#11

LMsbO!!

That’s a good one!

#12

The answer is simple,

Kevin costner