7/2010 Winner: Jeff Burk, Shatnerquake

GWC Community Book Club Winning Nominees and Polls
#1

Art, no…but read the synopsis:

"It’s the first ShatnerCon with William Shatner as the guest of honor! But after a failed terrorist attack by Campbellians, a crazy terrorist cult that worships Bruce Campbell, all of the characters ever played by William Shatner are suddenly sucked into our world. Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner.

Featuring: Captain Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, Rescue 911 Shatner, Singer Shatner, Shakespearean Shatner, Twilight Zone Shatner, Cartoon Kirk, Esperanto Shatner, Priceline Shatner, SNL Shatner, and - of course - William Shatner!

No costumed con-goer will be spared in their wave of destruction, no redshirt will make it out alive, and not even the Klingons will be able to stand up to a deranged Captain Kirk with a lightsaber. But these Shatner-clones are about to learn a hard lesson…that the real William Shatner doesn’t take crap from anybody. Not even himself."

COME ON… WHO’S ON BOARD!!! :slight_smile:

#2

Whut? Where? Who? When?

I don’t know what the frak you’re talking about, but I love it!!

KITTEH!!

EDIT: Found it!!

http://www.amazon.com/Shatnerquake-Jeff-Burk/dp/1933929820

I wants. Must get. wondering why teh frak i didn’t write this

#3

Sure… I love a good Shat… It’s been awhile since i had a good Shat.

#4

O.M.Gs. No way. I need this! Now! Holy Craaap.

(nice usage of Kitteh, Talos! btw, for the unTwitterers, Kitteh is the new “cool”. Tell your friends.)

#5

…and am anxiously awaiting the arrival so I can immerse myself in the epic battle between the Shats and the Campbells…

#6

Denny Crane.

#7

The worst written book ever…and the grammar is awful…but…the plot… GENIUS!!

#8

I was worried about that. I’m reading Shatner’s autobiography ‘Up Til Now’ instead.

#9

It’s a free download for today: http://jeffburk.wordpress.com/2009/11/16/download-shatnerquake-for-free-today-only/

(Use the Megaupload link)

#10

Ossim! Thanks for the heads up, Pike! Downloaded! Use the megaupload “regular” version for the free copy. I can’t wait to read this.

#11

Wow! Way to go, Jeff. Thanx Pike.

#12

The Book Club selection for July and August, after a photo finish, is Jeff Burk’s Shatnerquake.

The people had broken down into a tribal mindset and were searching for something, anything, to blame the current disaster on. One target stood out amongs all the others: the Star Wars memorabilia dealers. The crowd rounded them up and herded them into the cleared out center of the rom. They circled the dealers and hurled insults.

“Luke is emo.”

“George Lucas is the cause of all pain and suffering.”

“Han shot second.”

The dealers were then pelted with plastic lightsabers and discounted Jar-Jar action figures until they stopped moving.

SPOILERS AHEAD

#13

I’m only a couple of chapters in but this is pure chaos. The whole cult worship aspect of the book creates a world within a world and to be honest, I think I’d feel right at home.

Campbellians unleash an onslaught of Shatners accidentally, as a result of a botched terrorist bombing. Pure madness but a ton of fun.

I’m not really impressed with Burk’s portrayal of Shatner’s various persona’s. They are bland and lack substance. That may be part of the plot. I’ll have to wait and see.

#14

This sounds epic.

How’dyou like it (if you got 'round to finishing)?

#15

I haven’t yet. The “Real” Life gig is really cramping my play time.

frakkin “real” life.

#16

I’ve finally finished reading this. I grabbed my iPad and just plowed through it this evening. Now I can cross something off my to-do list.

Anywho, there is so much in this “novel” I don’t agree with. Burk portrays Captain Kirk (or the Fiction Bomb creation version of JTK) as a post-traumatic typical TOS Starfleet Captain. You know the type. A deranged meglo-maniac who buckled under the pressure. Captian Kirk’s decisions during the phenomenon goes against everything that the character is. Every version of Shatner pops up: Incubus Shatner, Priceline Shatner, Singing Shatner, TJ Hooker, Rescue 911 Shatner, and even SNL “Get a Life” Shatner (not surprising since it takes place in a convention).

This is the epitome of Shatner-ploitation. About half-way through I figured the only way he could end this story was the way he did, in a blaze of glory. Unfortunately by the time I got there, I could only view it as a feeble escape from despair (on the part of the character and author).

Burk exploits the persona of William Shatner but never tries to embrace the man. Obviously, this book is not meant to even breach that topic but it would have probably provided a little more heart (and to be honest, substance). Still, it was fun to see a world where supposed self-inflated B-movie actors (Bruce Campbell, Adam West, Shatner) become messiahs and Conventions their house of worship.

That being said, Burk also fails to represent the Con culture properly and instead demeans it in a typical and peripheral manner. I understand this is a farce and meant to be taken tongue-in-cheek but I can’t escape the feeling that this concept could be explored with interesting results.